Friday, May 8, 2009

The few, the proud....

As of today, I'm officially in recruitment mode. I was inspired by my fellow burger eaters in New York who have plenty of good reasons to pursue the lofty dream of a monthly burger tasting. I'm hoping we in Chicago can live up to those tough Gotham standards with the newly minted Burger of the Month Club - the Chicago chapter. 

I've pulled in some pretty heavy hitters to accompany me on this monthly foray into the sometimes seedy but always sensorially rewarding world of burgers. So far, two Jews, an Italian, and maybe a German/Irish/Dutch guy have signed on. A little lady in Austin, Texas is so moved by the pursuit, she wants to start her own chapter there. We will help her find the way. 

Unlike the Army, I won't recruit just any guy who walks in off the street. Though I love those who love vegetables, there are no vegetarians allowed. I can just see it now: an insidious underground counter-blog, dissing us in all of our red meat glory. Likewise, no vegans, raw foodists, those with extreme food allergies (I'm having visions of requests for soy cheese), PETA members (I foresee another counter-blog, this one well-funded and written by supermodels), or those who ask for sauce on the side. As for those who keep kosher, you'll have to square it with your God. I'm not getting in the middle of that one. 

We will meet once a month on a day convenient for everyone. Each month, a different member will choose the venue. Our brothers in arms in New York are so prideful, they pre-test their burger of choice, lest they suffer humiliation should it not be up to snuff. In Chicago, we don't blame the taster for a lousy burger; we blame the cook.  

The scoring will be an uncomplicated point system. A burger can achieve a high score of 100. There's no need to define what makes a great burger here. Experienced burger eaters know it when they see it, smell it, taste it, and get it on their clothes.    

I will try to cobble together some sort of official Burger of the Month - Chicago chapter scorecard, complete with a section for personal comments. Writing implements will not be furnished, so please bring your own. 

Fries will not affect the scoring. Great fries do not a great burger make. And vice versa. 

Each month, a post will be dedicated to the outing. The reportage will be honest but fair, and uncompromising. Burgers are serious business. I will treat them as such. 

With that, I happily inaugurate the Burger of the Month Club - the Chicago chapter! Inquiries are welcome in the comment section. Current members, I'll be in touch....


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